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David Wygant Dating Coach For Men And Women
The Fearless Code
You need 15 minutes a day. Every time you’re out you have another opportunity to learn and practice becoming a natural. Everywhere you are directing your own movie of life and you get to decide how the story unfolds.
Women look for that magical moment where they meet a man in everyday situation and exchange numbers and the rest is history.
Nothing guarantees failure more than trying to be “someone else” in the dating world.
It’s about using your inherent traits – traits that you already possess. Saying what’s on your mind in every situation with confidence, clarity, strength and conviction.
It’s not about the lines, we connect to people based on their emotions, it’s about the feelings, the actions, the strength and the tone of those words as they come out.
Become the person who’s in control of his own movie – authentic leading man who delivers each thought and conversation with conviction, strength, clarity and without carrying about the outcome.
Without a script – you need to be present in the moment and in tune with what’s going on.
Don’t try to perform like Jim Carey, instead connect emotionally.
When I approach a woman I want to find out who she is so I know whether or not she is somebody I’m interested in getting to know.
Most men are trying to sell themselves to a hot woman, instead she has to qualify to you to see whether or not she’s worthy of your time.
If you get her number with your 5 minute routine she will later start to notice the inconsistency in your personality.
The best opening line is one based on an observation about something happening in the moment.
Everyone is just as afraid as you have been in the past when out in social situations.
Ultimately, from the many women you’ll meet, and after sifting through them
to find what you want (not the other way around), you’ll find the one you
DESERVE to be with — and it will be entirely your choice.
What’s your daily routine?
You need to pay attention to women and see what’s surrounding you at all times.
How do you meet women during your day?
Places I meet women now and how I meet them
• on parties – Pr’ Ostrigi, Top, Skelet, Modrijani
Places you want to meet women
• on the street
Why won’t your approach the women who intrigue you?
Reasons why I won’t approach someone
• I’m not good enough – her male friends have higher status
• I have no idea what to say
• It’s too late, I should have done it right away
• My haircut and clothes are terrible today
• She looks busy
These are the excuses that are preventing me from meeting other amazing people, they are really my FEARS.
All the excuses that you’re planting in your head, is NOT what she’s thinking, because you have NO IDEA what she’s thinking.
When you want to go talk to somebody, just do it. The only thing my fears are doing is keeping me in my shell and preventing me from meeting great new people.
Mental note: The next time I hear one of these pop in my head, I am going to recognize it for what it is, an excuse that’s preventing me from being the man I want to be.
How you see yourself will ultimately be the EXACT same way that others see you!
How do you feel about yourself?
If you feel great about your overall image you will attract women who feel the same way, if you don’t feel great you will attract insecure women.
I feel great about myself! I’m an amazing guy!
You have to be comfortable with yourself for others to be attracted to you!
Do you like your wardrobe?
You need to KNOW you’re wearing the right thing that makes you feel confident.
I like my wardrobe, I just need a few more pair of jeans.
Do you like your body image?
I like my posture and muscles. I need to make my teeth whiter, and try out different hairstyles to find my best match.
I will buy teeth whitening product and shave regularly, wash my face to make my skin look better.
Getting new haircut, playing football and eating a healthy dinner – if only for that ONE NIGHT you’ll feel far more confident if you hadn’t done these things!
Do you consider yourself approachable?
I always have good poise, smile back at people and remain present so I can recognize what’s going on.
Do you attract “The Hoverer”?
Position yourself so you’re more approachable – flirt non-verbally.
You need to be the man who is easy for women to approach. It works both ways.
If you find yourself hesitant about approaching anyone, you’ll usually find
that you may have a lot of nervous energy inside that others are picking up
Things that they should be looking for are:
• Do you smile a lot?
• Are you dressed appropriately for the occasion?
• Could you have dressed differently to enhance your physical traits?
• What’s your body language?
• Do your unique traits stand out
Stay away from “wolf pack” mentality
Here’s a good example. When a woman likes a man, she’ll give a guy a casual look, maybe smile a little bit, and that’s about it. Those are her cue. to the guy that she’s interested in finding out more. But when a man who’s part of a wolf-pack is attracted to a woman, he’ll look at her 75 times. At
least. And the problem is, when she sees a man looking at her 75 times, she’ll wonder, “Why is this guy looking at me so much, and why is he not approaching me? What’s wrong with him?” By the time he’s given her the creepy wolf stare for the 75th time, she can’t wait to get her and her
girlfriends out of there… And when the guy finally does work up the courage to break from the pack
and approach her after creepy glance number 75, she’s already repulsed by him, and he’s left wondering what exactly he did wrong to have yet another woman reject him…
Women are attracted to men who are having fun. Whenever I go out, I’m always having fun. I don’t care if it’s going to the market, going to grab a cup of coffee, or going to the dry cleaners- I’m going to chat people up. I’m going to make it an experience. I’m chatting up people who work there,
people standing in line, and people outside. I don’t even drink coffee, but I’m going there to create an experience. I’ll talk to anyone- it doesn’t matter if they’re men, women, children, dogs, cats, reptiles; it doesn’t make a difference. Everywhere I go, I’m creating an experience and making it
I will start creating fun experiences and interactions with people, no matter what I’m doing.
Most people are not smiling, not enjoying, when you go out and experience things and you feel and you smile and you touch, women become attracted to you. They can feel your energy. People are attracted to people having fun.
It’s about being natural with everyone and having an easy confidence and charm about you that people are naturally attracted to.
Every natural is a good conversationalist – ability to walk into any situation and immediately be at ease and comfortable and make everyone else around them feel the same, conversation just flows and hours have gone by, but it only feels like minutes.
If you are able to really LISTEN, then you’ll be able to comment on it, because it is going to bring out an emotion, a story, or some way of connecting to it.
Do not force conversation, and don’t interrupt people. Just react to what they said.
Reasons why I’m a good listener
• I have no distractions (phone, playing with things…)
• I make good eye contact – left eye
• I am present in the moment and notice everything that has to do with that person
How I can become a better listener?
• I can make more eye contact sometimes while she is talking
• I can think less about other things that have nothing to do with this conversation
• I can trust my unconscious and stop planning next topics that I can start
• I can interrupt less and let them finish.
When I have the next conversation I have to think about at least one of these reasons and make an effort to improve it.
Being a good listener makes you a great at flirting. The key point to great flirting is listening to what she is saying so you can respond charismatically, so the conversation is interactive, not one-sided.
To recap, here are four useful tips on how to help you become a better listener:
1. Don’t think about what to say next. Listen to what she is saying
at the moment.
2. Comment on what you just listened to her say – good conversation is interactive.
3. Allow her to speak. Don’t interrupt her in mid-sentence and tell her about a story.
4. Don’t change the subject! Wait, and you’ll get your chance to talk about something that really interests you – or, if she is THAT boring, try talking to someone else!
The power of he talk/she talk
The following four traits of a great conversationalist are generally traits of a “she talker”:
1. The ability to observe the actions of those around them. This gives them the ability to create things to talk about with others;
2. The ability to listen. This is the best trait that every great communicator must have;
3. The ability to stay present in the moment. A great communicator is not always thinking about what to say next and does not have a predetermined script in his/her head of what to say; and
4. The ability to relax when speaking with someone. A good conversationalist is able to be okay with what’s happening in a conversation and is not “outcome driven” when involved in a conversation
Imagine speaking to a hot, sexy woman. If you’re not relaxed, you’re thinking during the conversation only about how badly you want to go out with her, and you’re not listening to her, you’re NOT going to intrigue or affect her which means… you will not be going out with her.
1. A “he talker” has random thoughts running through their head at
100 mph. Women may have perfected multi-tasking, but “he talkers have perfected multi-talking, i.e., they will talk about six things at once and then come back to one of the topics later.
2. “The ADD Syndrome.” A lot of “he talkers” have trouble concentrating when they talk, because they’re always, always, always thinking and looking around the room at visual stimuli that makes them lose their train of thought.
3. “He talkers” are braggarts. They tend to like to boast about their accomplishments, thinking that others are attracted to someone who brags about their car, money or career successes. I call this man the “wing flapper.”
4. “He talkers” are competitive talkers. When they brag about their careers, other “he talkers” want to out-do them. “He talkers” are competitive about their sports teams, their golf game, their careers, and most everything, which isn’t necessarily bad, but is when that’s all you can talk about.
Some women can be “he talkers” so you can change your conversation type to match her type and keep the conversation going, but you will not always be able to communicate and connect with every single member of the opposite sex.
Levels of “she talking”:
• Level 1 is the small-talk “she talker.” This woman is really good at having conversations about the weather, your job, or the traffic.
• Level 2 of a “she talker” is a woman who likes to get very deep and loves the fact that you want to listen, but is scared to ask you any questions.
• Level 3 is “the interrogator she talker.” This is a woman who wants to know everything and questions you about everything. She doesn’t want to assume the meaning of anything . . . she wants it clarified.
• Level 4 of a “she talker” is a woman who is experienced and very comfortable in her own shoes. She knows who she is as a person, what’s important to her, and what she’s looking for in others. She wants to get to the deepest level of conversation and stay there, because that is what really turns her on at the most meaningful level.
You have to understand what people are thinking about right now, and join them in that experience – connect with them in the present moment.
I won’t feel like a conversation, it’ll just be a shared experience, much deeper than words.
Exercise: Write down everything you see: “Today I saw this women in the coffee shop take a sip of her coffee and burn herself…”
Then think about what you could have said to you wanted to have a conversation with her. I could have said something simple like, “Wow that coffee must have been really hot. Are you ok?” or something more creative like “Are you ok?
They should make coffee mugs with alarms to warn you if the coffee is too hot.”
Remember it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it. And it’s also about being present in the moment and having the ability to listen. So go out and practice this.
Exercise: Choose a favorite location of yours, and observe people, and think about what you could say in each situation.
The power of observation
Not thinking about what to say next, instead observing and reacting to what is going on.
Speak with authority and clarity and you own your words while you are making a great eye contact with that person. You have no idea what that moment is going to bring and no idea what she’s going to say and that is the way it needs to be if you want to make meaningful connections with her.
As men we lack of patience and are very outcome driven – we want that phone number
Women work more on self-development, men think only losers need help and are too proud.
Women get bored when talking about the weather, you need to go deeper and get into her world.
When you talk about the weather and ask her for a phone number you show that you are only interested in the way she looks, when you relate to what’s happening you differentiate yourself from other men.
For men, attraction can happen instantly, and on the flip side, be over just as instantly. For women, it tends to build up over time, and then slips away over time. I call this concept: “ATTRACTION MOMENTUM.”
Men are visual and they are instantly attracted to a women so much that they lose all sense of reality and their surroundings.
Woman can also be attracted to a man’s looks, but she also looks for man’s energy, confidence, the tone of his voice, and the way he listens when they speak, and over time these traits become more important than his looks.
To attract a man woman can seduce him with her eyes and her sex appeal, to attract a woman, a man needs to intrigue and seduce her mind. She wants a man to open her up and let her connect with him, like she’s never been opened up before.
In order to create attraction I need to shut up and listen. Men tend to try to “close” a woman by selling themselves to her and trying to impress her (“wing flappers”)
Creating attraction momentum – step 1:
The initial approach
Women can see you coming from a mile away, if they are attracted to you, they want you to approach them. If you give them a smile they will usually smile back, even if they’re not interested.
When you look at a woman with a very sexy, confident smile, you’re going to intrigue her, turn her on, because most men look nervous.
Exercise: Practice smiling until it’s second nature.
Practice in front of the mirror or camera. See how you smile and how you feel. See if it was warm, confident and powerful, become relaxed and natural with your smiling.
Remember how you felt so you are able to smile like that every time and keep practicing. Work on your smile and be confident with it.
A lot of her defenses will come down if your smile perceives you as warm, open and friendly.
The way you approach will cause the attraction momentum to either rise or fall. Don’t stare at her too long before you approach, and you also need to approach with authority. Show her great body language, with your shoulders back, and which will give you a natural commanding presence, not one that appears forced.
Do this right away and attraction momentum will continue building after your smile.
Pretend she is an old friend, make an observation, use great body language and voice tone and start talking without hesitation.
The moment you do something that makes you just like the thousands of other men, you get sent back to the bottom, and it’s really hard to make it back once you’ve been sent down.
Page 49: Examples of he talk/ she talk
Do not have a predetermined set of questions that you ask one after another, you can ask one, but then react to her answer instead of moving to another question.
Creating attraction momentum – step 2:
You need to observe what she’s doing so you can jump into her head while you talk to her, so that the conversation is based on something she’s doing, and it’s natural.
Stay present in the moment so a conversation you have with her is just an extension of her thoughts. She will not have the defenses up like with a canned line and you will be bonding with her.
Right now it’s not about the end results, it’s just building confidence and practicing.
Results don’t matter, because I will make so many connections. Also, I need to remember that she’s not judging me, she’s living in her own thoughts and her own life at the moment. Just observe what’s going on, and go for it and see what happens.
Creating attraction momentum – step 3
Listen and react
When most guys approach a woman, they try to create a whole new feeling, thought, and conversation than the one she’s having. For example if a woman is eating a peach at a farmer’s market most guys will approach her with asking her about the weather or crack some joke, instead of picking the obvious thing.
So let’s put the steps I’ve shown you up to this point all together. Pretend you see a woman eating a juicy peach at a farmer’s market. How do you come across as the confident male instead of the bumbling guy who has nothing to say? You’ve already completed the first step, observed
what she’s doing. The second step is to walk over immediately. Walk over with authority and confidence. When you approach her, be playful and say:
You: ” ” “That looks great. Can I have a bite?”
Woman:” “I don’t know… I don’t know if I’m in the mood to share
You:” ” “What, you don’t like to share?”
Woman:” “I love to share, but I don’t even know you.”
You:” ” “What do you need to know in order for me to get a bite of that
” ” peach?”
Woman:” “Well, we could start with your name.”
You:” “So all I need to do is tell you my name, and I’ll get a bite of
” that peach?”
You:” “I’ll tell you what. Take me to where you got that peach, and I’ll
get my own. Then we’ll compare and see who got the better
peach. We’ll go bite for bite.”
Woman:” “You’re on… I’ll go bite for bite. I believe in my peach.”
You:” ” “What else do you believe in?”
Conversation was based on observation, which turned into a fun game about something that she was already doing, instead of taking about random thoughts.
You are being playful, different and you’re on your path to becoming a natural.
Bob asked for a tampon and for a bite of ice cream. The whole point is that you don’t care, you’re just flirting, being fun and doing this allows you to naturally flow into other conversations.
So what have you learned so far about attraction momentum? It’s made up of three simple parts. The first step is all about two things, flashing your confident smile to let her know you’re playful, confident, and open, and then immediately, confidently walking over to her to keep that attraction momentum building. Next you should make an observation about her world, and then join her in that world without breaking her train of thought. Finally, listen and react to what she’s saying!
Step 2: Get real
Figuring out what type of women I’m attracted to and what type of man I am.
Most men for some strange reason immediately begin to doubt themselves when they see a person that they are attracted to.
Who are you and what do you want?
What “type of woman are you attracted to?
1) She can’t be a smoker
2) She has to be attractive, and passionate so I can have a great physical connection with
3) She needs to be intelligent
4) She has to have high self-esteem
5) She has to support me and tolerate my vision and hobbies
1) Preferably not taller than 170 cm
2) Preferably likes most of the things that I like for example food, music…
3) Didn’t have a lot of sexual partners
4) Preferably has a vision and a plan for the future and actively makes those steps happen
When I’m clear about what I want I won’t compromise when I go out. I am able to pull away faster.
Guys who aren’t clear about what they want get infatuated by the way a woman looks, and they often have a sense of desperation, because they don’t want to be single anymore, so they compromise on all the things that are important to them just because they have a live body sitting across from them at the table. I am not this guy, I am able to confidently sit across from a woman and realize she’s not for me and won’t get stuck in relationships that never work.
I believe in the law of abundance: there are amazing women for me wherever I go, and I will not settle for a woman that hasn’t all of my non- negotiable traits.
Write about your dates and traits that women had. Maybe a girl doesn’t have all non-negotiable traits, but you still want her and that’s fine. You may want to change list over time to add or remove important and unimportant traits.
It’s important to be aware of what’s truly important to you, but don’t let that awareness prevent you from enjoying life and all of it’s wonderful experiences. You can still enjoy her company even if she’s not the perfect person based on your list. Connect with people, so when you meet that perfect person, you’ll be relaxed and comfortable due to the abundance of life experiences you’ve had.
What “type” of man am I?
Height 181 cm
Weight 72 kg
“Build”: In shape
Hair: brown, pretty good haircut
Education: Finished high school
Income: above average
Top 3 “Features”: Motivation to improve myself, great body, intelligent
Top 3 “Flaws”: not very good in social situations, not being able to approach and connect with people I don’t know, lack of observing ego and confidence when in field
“One night stand” or relationship: One night stand
“Active” or Mellow: Active
Sex – Always or Rarely: Always
Shy or outgoing: shy
Social or homebody: homebody
Family or friends: family
Giver or taker: taker
Top 5 perfect dates
Top 5 interests: money, psychology, music, food, sports
Top 3 Vices:
Describing myself helps me see what I think of myself and who I really am
Use best tools you have to communicate confidence, because confidence is the most important element needed to be successful in the dating world.
New haircut, new shirt or good listening skills make you more confident, because they make you feel better about yourself and THAT is what generates genuine confidence, something that attractive and sexy potential dates can see and feel…
Fears and Excuses
Get rid of people that generate negative energy around you!
Develop the “I don’t care” attitude, and let negative situations (person who criticized you, a woman who didn’t respond to you…) just bounce off you. Don’t let it affect you!
But if let’s say 10 people told you that you’re lazy or you don’t seem to care about anyone but yourself – take notice! You need to be aware of how you come across and change so you can have meaningful relationships with others.
I know that some people are not meant to be a part of my life, I get over it when it happens.
I am self-assured about who I am and don’t have a set back if one person doesn’t like me or doesn’t respond to me. A strong confident man doesn’t mind being rejected, because it means that he is going out and trying to connect.
The only criticism I listen to is if it’s a common them after meeting 20 or 30 people, not after meeting only one woman. I do not dwell on what she thinks.
I will not quit when the first hint of things don’t go as planned!
Life is a numbers game, game of repetition. When you’re good you forget the bad experiences and focus on the very next one, because I have a system behind me that works and will lead to success, no matter the situation.
A lot of guys think that they are on the front page news, that every woman who rejected them was going to tell all her friends.
In reality, people are so consumed with themselves, that even if you do fail, others have no interest in talking about it with anybody else. And it really doesn’t matter what other people think about you! The best way to overcome this is to be playful, not taking it too seriously.
This way I will get outside of my head and stop thinking the world is criticizing me, it only matters how I criticize and evaluate myself.
I really don’t care what strangers think about me. The important people in my life aren’t strangers and people who matter might start off as strangers, but they won’t remain strangers.
I accept myself, there are things that I can’t change about myself, but I can change my attitude and the way I go out and approach the world.
If you don’t, here’s the situation that will keep replaying in your life, and one that I’m sure you are already familiar with. Imagine there’s a hot woman standing there, and you want to talk to her. You start to think about what you’re going to say, but then Mr. Fear shows up and invites Mr. Excuse, who pretends to soothe you… “It’s OK buddy. You don’t need to do this right now. It’s OK; you don’t need to approach her. It’s all right, it’s not the right time, it’s not the perfect moment because… [insert yet another fear/excuse here]”
There is no perfect moment or right time, you can always come up with excuses.
Everyone is just as afraid as I’ve been when it comes to meeting someone new.
If everyone is afraid and some people do it easily it tells me that they made the decision to not let fears and excuses run their lives, and so can I.
What are my usual “fears”?
Fear is what you’re afraid might happen, an excuse is what I tell myself so I can avoid my fear.
My fears when it comes to women
1) Not having anything to say after hi
2) She is busy or taken
3) It will look weird in front of everybody
Page 70 examples
We have same fears and excuses, what makes us different is how we choose to handle these situations in life.
Getting over a fear takes putting yourself out there and realizing that the fear is all in my head. Like learning how to swim, once I know how to do it, I gain confidence and know that I can swim in any situation.
Step 3: Wake up, she’s not standing at your front door
Observe the world around you – watch interesting women who are all around
Exercise: For an entire week watch amazing women. How they behave, how they move and what they do for fun with other women. Just sit near them to observe how they speak to each other.
We all let our guards down and are our closest representation of our true selves when we are in situations that we are comfortable in, so observe how women communicate on their level.
Observe their body language (leaning, smiling, eye contact…) and note it, each time something new.
In the end review what you learned and how you can use it.
Also observe guys, most importantly observe the most flirtatious man in a social situation. Observe the guy in the center of things and how he interacts with women.
Things to look for should be…
• What’s his body language?
• Is he smiling a lot?
• Does he look like he’s having fun?
• What’s his energy level like?
• How do other people react to this guy?
• What are some differences between this guy and you right now?
• After observing what he’s doing, could you do the same thing?
I don’t have to talk to anyone new during this, just observe.
Also look at the guys standing in the corner and notice how they stand, if they are having fun or if they look miserable.
Compare them to the guy that’s having fun. What type of energy does he have? What level of confidence does he convey? Is he listening to his friends and enjoying himself? Would you want to be friends with this person and hang out with him?
Look at men who are getting rejected 24/7. What body language do they have?
You will learn subtle little things that are turning women off and on.
Find the differences between those two guys in body language, eye contact and see which one of those you are closer to. Pick a few differences and work on improving them. It can be as simple as making more eye contact when talking to strangers.
It’s more effective if you see everything for yourself out there to remember what you should do and what not.
Do it in places that you’re comfortable in so you are relaxed and you can observe.
Now start improving things, no matter how small they are.
While you are walking around notice women and think:
• Where were you when you saw these women?
• What were they doing?
• Did they seem approachable?
• Anything unique or exceptionally interesting about them?
• What are the excuses you find yourself making for not talking
with them, and are they valid (hint: no excuse is ever valid, it’s only
a fear in disguise!)?
• What could you have said based upon your observations?
I need to start doing this until it becomes second nature.
People are always attracted to others who are happy.
Exercises to practice being yourself:
Smile at every woman
Practice smiling at women in general to prepare yourself to smile at those you’re interested in
To become comfortable with smiling more often
“Hello” – say it as often as possible, so when I find someone irresistible and need to talk to her I won’t even have to think twice about it
Introduce yourself – “Hi, I’m Mitja.”
I will introduce myself to everyone with whom I interact on a regular basis.
If I go to the neighborhood coffee shop to get my morning coffee, I will introduce myself to the woman behind the counter if I haven’t done so already.
If I go to the supermarket one evening after work, I will introduce myself to the woman behind the deli counter.
It doesn’t matter if I like them or not, I am becoming more approachable to the world around me.
Becoming a familiar face at places is excellent.
You want women to see that you the woman behind the deli counter said “Hello” to you, so I come across as friendly and intriguing.
Make eye contact
When I see someone I find attractive I will make eye contact with her for five seconds. By that time I will be smiling, most people look away and I am becoming more confident and not caring about the outcome.
Like an old sales technique – “Shut up and let them talk.” If you break eye contact and talk she has the upper hand.
If I do verbal batting exercise every day it changes my energy, I start to become more confident and more self-assured.
You’re not worried about impressing that one woman, you’re just being yourself, you always talk to everybody, including her.
Step 4: Putting together the pieces
The first step is to OBSERVE. After observation comes a comment. It’s simple, just make a comment about my observation. Next step is to LISTEN. Pay attention to what she says, which will lead to a natural conversation with anyone, and it all starts from foundation of my observations of the world around me.
Here are the three main components to becoming a natural:
OBSERVE the world that’s around you…
COMMENT on that observation. It can be a question, something funny, or anything in between. Just get the conversation rolling…
LISTEN to what she says, and respond to it. Don’t try to have everything planned out, just react in the moment.
I will get better with practice, for first couple of of times the conversation will fizzle out pretty soon. I will become quicker at observing, better at listening and making conversation better.
The key to becoming a natural looks like this: SMILE, OBSERVE, COMMENT, LISTEN, SMILE!!
Step 5: Best places to meet women
9/10 times I will meet an amazing woman when I least expect it, there is no perfect place to meet them, I only have to be myself in every moment. Instead of looking for a quick fix, I need to observe and appreciate what’s already in front of me…
The easiest place to meet women. You can see the same person more than once, since they are shopping in their neighborhood. You can also see what they are buying, observation is easy.
Relaxed atmosphere where women can linger in certain spots for a while. It gives me opportunity to approach and make eye contact.
You can easily walk up and down, make eye contact with women you like, smile ti them and just say “hello” and comment on something you observe about them.
Best times – weeknights from 6-8pm, when they buy dinner – they will be relaxed.
Weekends – Saturday during lunch, or from 5-7pm.
Exercise classes are great, also dance classes.
Don’t be the creepy guy there just to hit on women! Just be present in the moment and enjoy yourself.
Be casual about it, ambiance is very calm. Encounter should be very innocent and casual. You can simply ask a question related to books. Make sure you walk through a section that interests you.
If there’s somebody attractive, I have something in common with them already.
Weekdays – lunch time between 11 am and 2 pm and between 7 and 9 pm.
Weekends – there isn’t a best time on weekends, it can be all day long.
It’s usually better on a rainy day.
Make yourself a regular in one of them. Learn all the people’s names who work there, you become a friendly familiar face. It’s a place to relax, catch up and have friendly conversations.
All of them have a different ambient, so you can find different types of women at different types of coffee shops.
Weekdays – before work from 7am to 9 am and after dinner from 8pm to 10pm.
Weekends – all weekend long
Nobody ever talks so it’s a perfect opportunity to say hello.
Atmosphere is very intimate, no distractions and you can have all her attention.
Good thing to say is “What is it about elevators? Why are people so quiet?
Waiting rooms at doctors, dentists…
The monotony of waiting for your appointment can be boring, this is my chance to be radiant! Break the boredom. Ask to pass a magazine, share your dislike of going to the doctor…
Other Great Places to Meet Women…
• Bank and Post Office
• Department of Motor Vehicles
• Salon and Spas
• Shopping Malls
• Car Wash
• Pet Stores
• Gas Stations
• Parks & Beaches
• Outdoor Cafés
• Gift Shops
• Hardware Stores
Don’t go places with the sole purpose of meeting women.
Step 6: Your mindset
It’s all about the mindset – how I approach every situation.
Do not take yourself too seriously. It’s not an “end all or be all” experience when I’m out there meeting women.
Remain open to new experiences with anyone and everyone. Do not put unnecessary pressure on a situation, keep an open mind for every situation. Anyone can end up playing a huge role in your life, even if you don’t expect it, even the girl that has a boyfriend when you meet her.
Allow dating to be what is supposed to be – FUN!
Never fear rejection. If I’m being rejected, that’s a good thing, because it means I’m out there actively meeting women and creating opportunities for success. Success and rejection go hand in hand, but I will not let fear of rejection slow me down on my goals. All of us get rejected at some point; the difference between succeeding and failing in life is how we deal with rejection. Move on, learn from it, and realize that this person had no purpose in my life except creating the learning experience and making me better and stronger as a result.
No matter how good I am, more often than not it’s not going to work out, but I will not remember 19 women that I didn’t hit it off with, I will only remember the one I did hit it off with. There are a lot of women out there, but only a fraction of those are right for me.
The best never remember their failures, they eliminate them from their mind so they can focus on succeeding the next time.
NEVER obsess about someone so much to the point that I’m giving my power over to someone else.
The energy that people can sense when they’re around me, the energy I feel when I go out…
That energetic vibe from someone who’s excited about something. The more observant I am about life, the more energetic I become about life and the more alive I feel and act, and then others notice that and gravitate toward me. It comes with practicing these exercises.
Knowing and experiencing are not the same!
Notice your energy and what happens if I have high or low energy, and what happens if other have low or high energy.
A quick word about body language
It has everything to do with my energy.
Pay attention to your body language, is my eye contact good, shoulders back, do I walk slowly, is my walk convincing, do I lean in? If my body language is strong, she will follow it, because life is a mirror.
Be like Clinton
Why are women so attracted to men in positions of power? Have you ever watched President Clinton walk around a room and talk to people? Have you ever gone to a networking event, and there’s one person who just seemed to be radiating energy, so much so that every woman was attracted
to him, and people were lining up to speak with him? And this magnetism and star power has only increased since he left the oval office. Men fail to realize that women are attracted to non-verbal cues. Watch Clinton work a room. In order to create irresistible attraction, I need to give my best 30 seconds to everyone I meet. Embrace and listen to everybody, pause for a second and then respond to it.
When women see the interaction that just happened, they will be aching for opportunity to talk to him. They see not only Clinton, but his power and reactions from others from their interactions with him. You need to make people feel special.
Attraction is being build second by second with each encounter you have, which will lead to conversation with the person you really want to attract.
Since high school women have been attracted to the men whom everybody else wants. I need to learn how to become that man.
I need to learn how to work the room and to speak and listen to everybody around me.
Most men don’t listen and women see that his interaction was not connected and lose attraction before you had a chance to talk to them.
I will give my best 30 seconds – it’s easy in places I am already comfortable in. I will make sure my energy is high and my body language is strong. I will never run out of things to say, because I know now how to connect based on what’s happening in the moment.
✓ Get to know the person who serves you coffee at Starbucks
✓ Get to know the person who scans your food at the grocery store
✓ Get to know the person who makes your sandwich at the deli counter
✓ Get to know the clerk at the bookstore
✓ Get to know the person who works the front desk at your gym
By giving these people the best 30 seconds every time you see them, everybody will be attracted to you, because they didn’t get that reaction from them, then she can either join in or you can join her in because she feels more comfortable already.
Step 7: Closing
That attractive woman has the same fears and is probably intimidated as much as you are.
Props are GREAT tools that you can use to your benefit to approach woman, such as places, surrounding objects and even other women.
It’s the little things that you do for them and observe about them that matter the most.
Props in Supermarkets
• Is she with anyone else?
• Does she look preoccupied or open for conversation?
• Then notice something specific
• Is she wearing nice shoes, a bracelet, or a shirt that can be complimented?
• Is she holding a can of tomatoes?
• Is she picking out a shampoo?
Example: Walk up to her, smile, tell her you like the bracelet, and ask where she got it. She answers Italy. You need to have enthusiasm and power in your voice.
One word answers can be a problem to most guys, here’s a way out:
Oh, did you get your bracelet in Italy? I went to Italy a couple of years ago. (Or, I’ve been dying to go there!) Which cities did you travel to?” (Notice: you’ve used an obvious local prop to create a DIFFERENT prop that is about HER – in HER comfort zone! “Italy” is now the prop that you can run wild with…)
Use the power of she talk
Instead of simply asking her where else she has traveled, say, “Of all the places you’ve ever traveled, which one really made an impact on your life?” Instead of asking, “What do you like best about Italy?” Ask her, “What was your most memorable moment in Italy?” Get her thinking, get her feeling, get her experiencing the conversation with emotion. The more you get her to feel, the better the conversation will be.
If she says, “I stayed in Rome for several days and traveled to Florence and Rome.” You can respond with, “No way, what was the most amazing moment you had in Rome?”
She will tell you about it, and all of the sudden she gives you more details about Rome, about this night she had at this café, etc. You can then ask, “What is it about the cafe that was so great? Was it the food, the aromas?” Do you see what I mean? Bring out her senses. If you do, you’ll bring out her emotions. If you bring out her emotions, she will connect with you, and want to continue connecting with you.
That’s how you can move the conversation forward from just asking about a bracelet.
Props in Coffee shops
Her friend can be a prop, so you can approach even if she has company, but pay attention to both of them. The conversation will be easier and both of them will say good things about you.
Props in bars
It’s a phenomenal place to practice and utilize new found skills.
How do you approach a woman at a bar, where her defenses are likely on high-alert from all the other guys doing the same thing?
First step after smile is observe where she sits, whom she’s with, who she’s calling, what she’s ordering – observe everything.
Smile and make eye contact to show her you noticed her. You can use her smile as a prop – “Thanks for the smile, were you checking me out?”
You can talk about other props that you have observed around. She will like the fact that you noticed all these little things around her. And lastly, I need to LISTEN. Don’t talk about yourself.
The 10pm rule
Most women go out on a Friday night to catch up, most men go out to chase skirts, but at the end of the night all they have in hand is a bill and an empty bottle, their energy is desperate.
Later the night gets more annoyed women get because of drunk guys. Her energy changes as hours go by, but men wait to get some “liquid courage” and find the right drunk moment to approach a woman.
Engage them before 10 pm, because they are open, they haven’t met with all their friends and didn’t see all those drunk guys yet. As the night progresses you will become even more attractive (without even being there), because so many guys will be drunk and try to hit on her.
Approach woman when she’s alone, before her evening begins, ask her if her friends are late too. If the conversation goes well and then her friend comes, quickly introduce yourself and then say something like: “Hey… I really enjoyed talking to you Amy. I don’t want to interfere with your time with your friend, so I’ll let you guys catch up. I’m going to call my friend and see where he is, but let’s get together next week and have a drink.”
She will compare all the annoying guys later on with you.
You should text her at 10 pm (if you met her 3 hours ago), by this time she will already be dealing with annoying guys, so get back inside her head. Just send:
“It was great meeting you earlier! How’s your night going? 🙂 I’m heading home. Just had dinner with a friend. Let’s talk tomorrow. [YOUR name]”
You will prove to her you didn’t get drunk somewhere like others. You will also start the next morning bright and fresh, ready to meet more women.
First impressions are everything, by approaching her first you are the most confident, you can give her the best five minutes of who you are (just like Clinton).
She will be alone, or with a friend who’s texting, because somebody’s missing.
You can smile and say: “Will you stop texting me? I’m here already. You will break that phone.”
She will laugh and you can say “OK, which friend is late?” She will complain. She feels like she knows you.
Be the Selector
Selector will open group with approach based on observation, women will compete for his attention.
The text opener – have a text saying: “Hmmm…Last night was really interesting. What are you doing later? :)”
The back story is I went on a date, we had a glass of wine, then it ended without a kiss.
Ask women what should you do. They will have comments, (Can I have your opinion on something?) They will tell you their booty-call rules and their dating habits.
The key is to listen – when she says “She’s booty calling you” I say “Is that what you do when you booty call a guy?”
It’s all about how I say it, and how I listen. Not worrying about what I look like or what happens if I get turned down. The more I talk to women, the greater chance of success I’ll have.
The walk away
For most men the conversation goes to different direction, they get inside their head and try so hard to make them like them, so they succeed in repelling her.
Walk away before that, you can get new observations and you have another chance at her later, otherwise you will just turn her off.
Walk away the right way
Say you would like to talk to her more, but you have to go back to your friends and leave, she will think to herself why you left, when other guys smother her.
It creates powerful intrigue in her mind and she wants to know who you are and how could you walk away from her.
She will find you, try to talk to you or look at you with a sexy smile so you stop.
Most guys are afraid to walk away because it took a lot of nerve to talk to her, but this is a great way to find out if you really connected with her.
A great thing to do is talk to other woman after you walk away on her so she becomes competitive.
It’s good to walk away at the peek of the conversation to make her want more.
Wrap it up
Take your time, you can take her number if you know 3 things about her. Just say: “You know what? Let’s get together…”
When you recall one of those things in future conversation you are telling her that you liked her and are interested in her and that you actually listen. You are different from every other guy.
Think of every conversation with no chemistry as a learning experience.
Be a gentleman when she refuses to give you her number, it’s good for both of you, she will remember it.
Carpe diem – seize the day.
Make your move and close the deal, be confident when you ask her, so her answer will be definitive yes or no.
Don’t ask, say “Give me your number”
Exercise: Practice saying these things in front of the mirror, so you say them as you never expect rejection, like you know her forever.
50 Great Ideas for First Dates
1 Take a ferry ride
2 Pack a basket and go have a picnic.
3 Funky, local coffee shop – (whatever YOUR favorite is)
4 Rent canoes at the nearest lake/river.
5 Play tennis
6 Go to sporting event
8 Take a dancing class – something
NEITHER of you knows!
9 Try a RARE kind of ethnic finger-food, like Sushi, Indian, Ethiopian, etc
10 See a play, opera, or symphony.
11 Invite some friends over for board games – be on the same team!
12 Comedy show
13 Hit golf balls at the range
14 Go to an Irish pub and have a “pint”
15 Rent or ride bikes – stop for ice cream
16 Go to a park and people watch
17 Take a YOGA class
18 Watch the sunrise from a special spot – slyly ask her about her favorite foods/snacks, and then bring some!
20 Go to an old-school diner – at any hour of the day!
21 Find a fire pit and roast some marshmellows
22 Cook a new recipe together and enjoy eating it
23 Have brunch at a classy hotel
24 Take the elevator to the top of a tall building – enjoy the view
25 Go to a horse track and bet the ponies!
26 Miniature golf
28 Sightseeing in your own city; pretend to be tourists…
29 Amusement park
30 Go to an indoor shooting range
32 Put together a Poker game
33 Horseback riding
34 White-water rafting
36 Sign up for a short run/walk race
37 Take a ride in a hot air balloon
38 Go to a casino
39 Bet on a few sports games and watch them together!
40 Ice skating/Roller skating
42 Take a short pottery making class together.
43 Play pool
44 Go to a Brewery
45 Visit a museum
46 Play paintball
47 Drive-in movie
48 Go wine tasting – compare wines
49 Take a drive in the country – stop for sandwiches and a picnic
50 Find a candy-maker, preferably chocolate…
Let me start by asking you what YOUR goals are. What would you like to accomplish over the next 30 days? Think about this question carefully, but here are three goals that I want to make SURE are on your list:
By now you should know firsthand how important it is say “hello” to as many women as possible throughout the day. In case you’ve forgotten, here’s another quick reminder why: Saying “hello” makes you more comfortable and confident in dealing with women you don’t know that well (yet). CONFIDENCE IS ATTRACTIVE!
· Saying “hello” allows you to practice making small talk, using props, and being able to listen to others.
· Saying “hello” creates friendships or relationships in your neighborhood that can be VERY useful in that key moment when it’s time to break the ice with someone who has caught your eye. You might even get a good “reference” when you’re not even there…!
· Saying “hello” multiplies your chances for success tenfold. This simple word opens the door to an entirely different level of dating success.
Pick a number – how many women are you going to say “hello” to
today? how about this week? Keep track of that number and make sure
you meet that goal!
As you’ve already learned, this is one of the cornerstones to the Fearless Code! Every single interaction you have should start with a simple observation, and it allows you to really connect with your world. Observing sets you free from thinking about lines and routines, and allows you to be
your natural self at all times. Not only that, but observing successful and unsuccessful guys in their interactions allows you to pay attention to what works and what doesn’t. As a reminder: GOOD examples of what successful men do:
· Put forth positive body-language
· Exude “Confidence”
· Wear clothes they appear confident in
· Have fun
· Comment on their observations
· Listen well
Here are some examples of what UN-successful men do:
· Put forth negative body-language
· Appear “Unapproachable”
· Do not make eye-contact
· Don’t smile
· Appear not to be having fun
Pick a place right now – where you can go to simply make observations and strike up conversations, and then see how many quality conversations you can initiate based on those simple observations! Pick the number of women you want to talk to today, and then make it happen!
It doesn’t matter how many women it is as long as you set a goal and stick to it. And, after reading the Fearless Code, you should realize there is NO shortage of opportunities out there for you…
Make next goals more challenging…it’s an ever-evolving game.
Don’t focus on numbers and percentages, focus on women that you go out with. It’s not quantity, it’s quality.
Relax, each encounter is just an encounter. There’s no reason to be serious.
Give everyone a chance, don’t ignore someone because you think she’s not as well educated or attractive as you’d like. Be friendly.
Talk to everyone! No expectations. Nothing is at stake.
Rather than taking weeks to work up the courage to talk to that one special woman, get into the habit of talking to women for practice. When you do talk to her, you will be more confident and relaxed.
Have fun, flirt, make eye contact, get to know her passions and life ambitions, build chemistry…
SMILE, OBSERVE, COMMENT, LISTEN – and SMILE!
Online Dating Secrets
Guy’s Guide To Texting
Same Night Romance
Girls Tell All
First Date Seduction
77 Bulletproof Approaches
7 Second Seduction
The Art of Close
Men’s Mastery Series
High School and College Game
Reputation is the key- all I need is one drunk party where I get a hot girl.
One event can change my life- whether it ‘s good and it gives us confidence or it ‘s bad and it pushes us back in our shell and we become shy, because we don’t have life experience and we think it’s the end of the world.
We don’t know that this was just the learning experience, we don’t know that there are plenty of women out there.
In college it ‘s all about creating social proof and you create it with talking to girls. Girls want what they can’t have and they don’t want the nice guy sitting in the corner who’s their friend, they want the guy that every other girl wants.
In a new environment people don’t know me as a shy guy, so I can easily become the big men, because I can be whoever I want to be.
I will make it happen when I’m ready for it- when I’m ready to do the work to gain reputation
I will do it thru experience. This is just the first step- just have an abundant mindset and see it as a learning experience, but I need to go for it! It’s just about having fun.
I gain confidence in every next experience.
Be honest and open.
You can change the perception of people because you see the same people all the time. All the frustration doesn’t follow me all the time, I get over it! I will not beat myself up. Whatever happens, at least I tried!
This is time for self-growth!
Girls are a blast, I will enjoy them and my college years!
How to create exciting, lasting relationships
number one reason for couples therapy are sexual issues
Get on the same page with each other in bed- be on the same team. You can ‘t find them sexy if you’re angry and annoyed by them. You have to make them feel good- addictions and problems don’t happen.
Tap into what’s still good in relationship and build around that- then you can communicate about your problems.
get on the same team, offer value to relationships
speak up! be yourself and bring it up -whether or not you talk about it it’s there
have fun (treasure hunt)
Walk away…so she chases you!
Most men will not walk away. They will go to a party and find a woman that they want to talk to. They will smother her and not leave, causing the attraction level to drop every minute.
I need to talk to her for a couple of minutes, have fun with the conversation and then walk away!
When I walk away I give her a moment to think about that I just walked away, and she wonders who I am and how could I walked away from her.
She will find me and smile at me or start talking to me.
Most guys are afraid to walk away because they finally had the nerves to talk to a hot woman. When I practice speaking to hot women I realize that the only way to see if I connected to her is by walking away.
When I talk random thoughts just to keep a conversation going it kills the attraction. Bad boys know the art of the walk away. Have them see you talking to other people, other women and giving them the best of you. She will come back, because they love a guy that has the ability to walk away even at the peak of the conversation- creates desire.
Bring her back to the magic moment
Keep them thinking about me after the date. As soon as I know that they are attracted to me (kiss, leaning in…) bring them back to that moment! Text her- “Hey I had fun last night. Tell me when you want to hang out in the parking lot until 2 am in the morning again :)”
Something that will make her come back and be excited. They keep thinking about what they experienced with me and hope they will get more soon. Text her the very next day. They are not thinking about 4 other guys or looking for new guys, they are thinking about you.
The High School Scenarios
It’s about the things that happen to you that give you confidence. Get the redemption- I can’t get that time back, but it can motivate me to redeem myself. In high school you just need to figure out what you want to do, to become, what are you interests… high school doesn’t make a difference, it’s short and it’s over!
• What do I like about myself and what do I want to improve for 20 minutes/day.
• Make a video journal and watch it the next day and see how far I’ve come.
In college I can do it all over again much better! Speak up and do what I want!
This is just the beginning and my coaches will be there for me every step of the way!
Build up my confidence every single day little by little without putting pressure on myself.
No matter how frustrated it was, it was just 4 short years in my long life.
The people that are putting me down are not happy and they don’t have their needs met. They are weak and insecure! Feel sorry for them and- walk away without teasing back.
Don’t try hard to be a great boyfriend, I will be hurt and she will lose attraction for me.
Don’t think that I have to be someone else to keep a woman- all the qualities are already inside me!
This is a beginning of becoming attractive- it’s a life long process
Don’t get stuck in my head, others are not better! I need to act! I could have a great story to share each time that I act!
Focus is on me, not what my friend is doing. Do what you want to do and don’t be like others.
Start thinking what I have, instead of thinking what you lack. Start complimenting the way I do things and look up to myself! When I start feeling good about myself everything changes. Don’t play basketball to get women, but if you are passionate about basketball go for it! Even if your friend Jim doesn’t want to join it, go for it or you will regret when you’re older.
Others are not as mature as me- I have courage to listen to this and wanting to change my life.
Every woman will be lucky to meet me.
The pressure in high school is off because I see her almost every day. I need to do the first contact.
Talk about food when you wait in line at the same time, the next time is even easier if you remember what you talked about (it can be food.)
Talk about how boring history was after the lecture. There is no right moment, don’t waste your time on fantasy. The importance is to communicate based on her reality- history
Don’t over complicate! Hello works in every situation.
Read and record things and listen how you sound.
It’s about teasing and having fun- she can say it’s none of your business and you can say you’re right and tease her.
High school is about bonding about the things that you do- same subjects, lunch, sport teams…
Opportunity to create what I want to be- write down what I want to achieve (be the big man on campus)
High school was not fun, I will make college fun!
• I’m good at foreplay and giving orgasms.
• I’m full of confidence, nobody knows who I am.
• I will go to parties and be popular- social person.
Interesting conversation- “Where is the best place to live when I’m in college?”
Location, location, location! People come to you, so socializing becomes the easiest thing in the world.
Form social circles based on what I like to do- join 5 things (where I eat, study…)
Make initial contact with them- say something, she’s already there.
The quicker I talk to her in the pub, the quicker I can talk to her next time in the library.
Gather information- take advantage of everything, observe and face fears!
It’s about living a lifestyle. Let’s find out all about the spots and people.
First week- all about observations
I will be able to help everyone because I know everything now, and have a confident walk.
Second step is taking action- approaching everybody.
Being able to say “Hello” to every woman- social proof
I’m not dealing with a rational mind, I’m dealing with a young female mind- they want what others have.
Talk to everyone wherever I go. They want the guy that they see at every party and is talking to everybody, not just with his one friend that he always brings with him.
They don’t want you if you didn’t talked to anybody, and now after 6 months she is the first girl that you are trying to approach.
Don’t stand in the corner- network! Using good body language, girls will say “This guy’s having fun.”
Girls start talking if there is no closure- tell them when it’s over, be honest and don’t avoid them.
Treat them well, have closure in order to avoid bad reputation. Have a reputation of a guy that cares about girl’s feelings or other girls will not want to sleep with me.
Make other respect you and stay loyal to your friends.
The dinner is my fulfilling life, the desert are women. They will want to be a part of it.
Don’t become a person that leaves the second something better shows up and try to win some kind of race.
Friends are first- if they’re not invited, I’m not going. There will always be guys who think they’re climbing some kind of ladder- they don’t have any real relationships in life.
They will be with women who are social climbers as well and women will leave them.
Don’t sell your friends for pussy.
My true relationships are with my buddies- they will stand up for me and be there for me- when I broke up with someone, or somebody doesn’t call me back.
Don’t hit on my friend’s ex or crush.
College part 2
It’s about an observation and comment once again.
Build a strong voice tone.
• Girl I have never seen before standing by the door of the classroom: “Are you in this class, I haven’t seen you before?”
• Girl standing in the line for food making a funny face: “Let me know what’s wrong with that food, I’m not ordering this.”
• Girl standing in front of the school on a sunny day: “Isn’t it a beautiful day out today?”
• Girl walking out of class: “Wow isn’t that class so boring?”
• Girl sitting in the classroom alone: “You’re early, let’s fill up the classroom.”
• Girl sitting in the corner texting: “Whoever you’re texting tell they have to come here right away and get this party starting, you can’t sit in the corner like that!” or “Stop! I’m here already, just talk to me.”
• Girl that’s running: “You wanna race? I’ll give you a head start.”
• Girl at a pub with three friends. You know one of her annoying friends so say: “It’s surprised me you even go out.” or say “History girl, what are you doing out, aren’t you suppose to be studying for the test, I thought you study a lot”
College is about teasing and direct eye contact. Ignore friends and they will wonder why she didn’t tell them about this cute guy.
After a minute introduce yourself to friends, to the one that you like the last, so she becomes competitive. Watch her light up.
Everyone knows each other, so go back to your friends. Keep dropping comments when you see her and don’t cling on to her.
Instead of walking around you can also position yourself next to the front door or bathroom.
Girl that’s blowing guys off all night long: “Hey, let’s get this party started.” Do it with a fun vibe. Or you can say “Why are you wondering around, come with me I’ll introduce you to the guy that you like.” Then you can tease her about introducing her to a chubby guy in the corner.
If you see her in a supermarket: “Hey, you go to the same college, what’s your name?” or “Hey, I know you…what’s your name?”
She’s walking towards me: “Are you going to class? What are you doing after class?”
It’s how you say it- casual.
Her friend’s puking and she’s holding her: “You’re a good friend, what was she drinking?”
Know you limits- don’t go over them with alcohol.
Alcohol brings people together.
Everybody has to bring someone new. Good sound system, dimmed lights…
Invite your neighbors.
Scout out bars- promote bars and organize events (advanced)
Build it and they will come- don’t worry about getting laid in a club, just create a fun experience
Women are friendly, they want to meet me.
Cracking the Code of Female Psychology
Get off the internet and out of the house and practice it!
We are visual, we check women out. Usually nobody get’s up and talks to her when we check her out. Woman describes what she wants in a man based on character.
They respond to guys that go for the approach (confident, funny, arrogant…doesn’t matter!) They care about the way we engage them, they care about self-assurance.
Don’t wait for 7 smiles, go right away and go all in, observe and comment (funny).
Women are attracted to confidence, power and attitude. They need to know that you can handle their sexuality- have a sly smile. Look directly at her and smile.
Picture her having a sexual fantasy about me- smile like that.
She wants me to me interested in her.
I know she has fantasies about me, I’m the leader (having an upper hand.)
Being the most powerful person everywhere I go- know everyone.
He who speaks first and engages always gets the number. Don’t check her out 74 times and then not approaching- don’t be a stalker, be a man of action!
Do not show the money card.
Most men never approach hot women. They treat them like fragile objects, not like people.
Always have a plan: “It was good talking to you, we need to get together, here’s my number.”
“Hi, I really don’t want to disturb you, I noticed you and your friends are having fun, but I had to go talk to you for a second. I want to get to know you.”
Girls are insecure, they don’t want just to sleep with you. They want you to be interested in what they think and who they are as well!
Be comfortable with the girl you’re with. Don’t date a girl that you fear that she’ll flirt with others or cheat of you. Never be submissive, don’t care what she does.
Exercise: watch people in bars
True interest- interesting questions, listen carefully and remember the details.
No interview questions! You have them by focusing on them!
Covey Strong Sex Appeal and Confidence
Becoming someone I want to be- my personality
Clint east wood, woody allen match
If my body language is strong we will have an amazing conversation, even if the guy before me didn’t get anywhere with the conversation with her.
Never be nervous, go for it- it’s how you say it!
Walk over knowing she wants to meet me. Practice walking.
Just say “hello” to people, then later ask a lady behind a counter to help you. One step at the time.
Keep cool around hot women- no credit for how she looks (no intimidation)
For one week walk up to every woman
No excuses, fears (fearless code)
Define the man that I want to be. I want to be a man that is:
How do I want to feel around women, how do I want women to feel around me?
I can’t become perfect right away without going out.
Approaching women that are just as insecure as I am is not a real fear! Every time that I have a chance talk to her. Real fear is shark coming at you or jumping without a parachute.
When I’m with a woman I’m 50% more attractive- social proof. Walk alone or with a girl.
Nothing turns her off more than 5 guys that are getting wasted. If I’m alone she doesn’t look at me like I don’t have friends, but as a guy that is confident enough to go by himself.
Go in restaurants, coffee shops alone on an off night- start going out by yourself.
Look who’s with who- take a look at guys that are succeeding (they are with a girl or alone)
Pack of guys are not successful usually, see what I have to avoid.
The Death of Pickup Lines
Every time I avoid the conversation I avoid having a chance to meet a great person and get into an amazing relationship with her.
Women will expose you in 30 seconds, you can’t get a quality woman with pickup lines.
90% of guys can’t start a conversation.
Excuses keep me in a comfort zone, don’t think! I will feel so much better when I approach, if I don’t I play the “should have could have would have game”.
Don’t put pressure on yourself- see her as a woman I don’t know, not as a potencial date
Talk about her- personal questions. I am interested in them.
If it doesn’t work it’s not a rule, it’s the exception.
If I have a lot of approaches I’m not desperate and don’t care about the interaction, because I’ll talk to another person in 5 minutes.
Don’t do the same thing over and over again expecting different results.
Define who I am- what’s my style, goals…
Don’t try to convince her, ask her name say “It was nice to meet you, I’ll see you again” and walk away- maybe I will see her with a hot friend that likes me and I’m a cool guy that walked away in the right way.
Live my life like an actor (presenting myself all the time, observing everything.)
I’m the main character in my pick up show- start filming and scripting it.
Learn from women that got away because I didn’t act. I make the move and then don’t care what happens.
Practice default things: “What’s your name? Nice to meet you, enjoy the night and maybe I’ll see you around.”
Lost- like watching a TV show.
Carrot girl- learn from the ones that got away, don’t miss another opportunity
5 seconds of observing, then approach
“You have been my entertainment for the night. I’ve watched guys being rejected by you all night long. I would have talked to you, but I didn’t want to waste my time. But tomorrow, you will be hangover and go for a coffee and you would pick me over all these guys who tried to hit on you drunk.”
close her with a detail of the conversation- reason for exchanging numbers is not physical attribute
eaves dropping-contribute to conversation, don’t kill it
I have to be unique and stand out. Be direct, get them to commit right then and there.
I have a boyfriend- “Lucky guy.”- evaluating relationship.
When you meet her: “How’s the boyfriend?” We broke up. – “Wonderful, it’s time for you and me to meet.”
Get on the phone faster, instead of text messaging- you can hear the reaction when you propose something (set the date up on the first call.)
If she’s pretty, she’s dating other guys, but I have a plan and information.
Never talk about money!
Talk about what’s around you: “Wow, I haven’t swing for a long time, that dog with a ball is cute.”
How you say it
Master approach, being confident leader, being comfortable in places I meet them, telling interesting stories.
Always make her break eye contact, smile…
Less is more- talk less about me, more about her (I’m more mysterious)
I have the control- tease her and create anticipation.
Less is more- talk about her more, when she speaks make strong eye contact, connect.
Women act based on how you look, talk and behave to them.
Breath deeply- don’t be nervous
New to them, old for me (perfect your stories.)
Self- deprecating humor works (I can’t lift those weights, show me…)
Creating Your Own Seductive Identity
The difference between a poor dressed man and well dressed man is amazing!
Spend money on some clothes- define your look
Shoes and watches are very important.
Music is the key to seduction.
Death cab per cutie lemon jelly, cafe del mar
Have clean house, candels are great, wine…
launch music, ambient music, mood music on iTunes
Pay attention to the details- be amazing dresser, have an amazing room…
Where to Meet the Best Girls
Be the center of attention- organize, make people look up to you…
All in depth in fearless code.
If I can smile and start talking to people, great things will start to happen.
I understand that I am able to do this while being relaxed.
20 % for everything- 20% for online dating, 5 favorite person, social circle, networking, approaching.
Be interesting in profile online- stand out from hundreds of guys, read her profile and write her about something she wrote in her profile, intrigue her, get her on the phone as soon as possible (“You’re great online, let’s see how you do over the phone.”)
In bars, the longer you wait, less chances you have, because more guys approached her so either she hooks up with a guy or she is pissed off because guys are being boring.
Give her best 5 minutes, then close the deal and walk away, so she compares me to other guys.
I also like to have stories to share with her. I’m not entertaining them! Getting opinion is great!
Don’t fear groups. I become the leader of a group instantly- everyone shares their opinion to me!
The girl that was a bitch to guys on a Friday night, will be very receptive on the Saturday, because she didn’t have a great time (all guys tried to hit on her.)
Next Step of Closing Her
Assume she’s single, don’t ask if she has a boyfriend. End conversation at the peak.
If you’re needy- check your feelings regularly
There is always a friend of her that want’s to ruin by calling you a player (“He probably picks a lot of girls in supermarket.”) Bring her back to the moment- make her glad she met you.
I need to be a bad boy that can get any girl, but chooses her- I’m not arrogant or predictable.
Don’t leave more than 2 messages, calls. Don’t call after 10 pm.
Don’t play games with her- if I keep my options open, she can do the same thing.
Resistance is in my own mind. The only resistance is her walking away. If she says “I have to go” that’s the time to ask her for her number. I have to do it, not her.
Don’t try to be slick and sly- it doesn’t matter how it looks like, the point is to start talking to them, not trying to observe them too long.
People don’t care if I flirt or if I get blown off. They care about their lives.
Don’t watch a movie before having a conversation- don’t watch movie next to a stranger.
Respect her, don’t talk about her to my friends.
Never take your pants off before socks.
If she’s not my type, I give a second chance, after that forget it.
Don’t worry what she thinks of me- stop! If she doesn’t say much she can just be shy, or thinking what I think about her.
Every time I assume I’m usually wrong.
Don’t drive myself and everyone else crazy with wondering what something meant- just ask and communicate.
Confront them on their bullshit. Pay attention to their wants and needs, but don’t try to impress her.
When is she lying? (when 2 or more of these signals occur)
• Changing voice pitch
• Changing speed in voice
• uhms and ams
• Change in eye contact
• Turning body away from me
• Seeing white in eyes at the top and bottom
• A hand reach- covering body, specially mouth
• Nervous movement of feet and legs
Pay attention to miss use between body language (face) and words.
If something is not right, ask another question about the same topic, if more signals appear say goodbye to her.
Secrets of Turning Her On
Women ‘s sexual complains:
• kissing her just when you want sex (unpredictably kiss her and do nothing else)
• dirty talk (don’t talk like it’s porn, calibrate!)
• ability to keep going (know when to stop and don’t be Mr. One Pump- stay deep in her and move slowly while pulling her shoulders close to you: you get her to climax)
• foreplay (make it long! Do what she likes, she gives you clues.)
Keep stimulating until she’s more satisfied than you. “Take my hand and show me how you touch yourself.”
Learn new positions and make yourself smell good.
Rub G spot and make pressure on her abdominal muscles.
Enjoy what they’re doing in the moment- don’t reject her when you’re not in the mood.
Don’t compare yourself to other people- “Am I better than other guys?” She will lie and she will know you’re insecure and not desire you as much.
Even if she likes me she may not want to see me again if she sleeps with me on the first date (when I say I had a good time, she means sexually, and that I want to get lucky again)
Sleep with her on the third date- build comfort with conversation, touching… several hours.
If she makes out with me in a club and I call her again she thinks that I had a good time just making out with her- not connecting with her.
Take the time to build a comfort zone!
Respect space the first date, touch her the second date (hair, neck, spine and kiss). I’m in control.
Figure out her style and mirror it- that’s what it’s all about.
3 date system:
• 1st date being intrigued and interested in her, mirroring her body language, leaning in when she tells a story, leaning back when I tell a story (mysterious), touch face and give her a kiss on the lips and say “There’s more to come, I’ll see you soon” and walk away. I’m in control and she desires me.
• 2nd date seduce her mind (a couple of phone calls in between), tease her (tell her a bed time story about the things that she told me, I had a dream about you, talk to you later), telling about a dream- sexual fantasy, do a make out session, don’t go in with her (“I have to stay calm, I will not trust myself”) and leave.
• 3rd date invite her to your house (music, candels, food and drink) and have sex
Don’t worry if she doesn’t do something. Take it slow- it may take 5 or 7 dates.
Test how open she is to sex (I have a buddy that’s dating this girl- 25 days until sex)
Don’t say “you’re the hottest girl I’ve ever been with”, you can compliment, but don’t give power away- I’m the leader (like I’ve been with her 1000 times before.)
Don’t be the provider. If sex lasts less then 5 minutes, she’s repelled (gold diggers.)
If you show money card she will use you.
If she has a boyfriend spend time with her while telling her she’s a good friend. Do not tell her you want her, just be there. After a month if her boyfriend is a jerk tell her she’s wasting her time and she should hang out with you- “I know you’re attracted to me, I won’t even ask, I know the way you look at me. We can take this to the next level and it can be everything you’re not getting in your life right now.”
I’m cool with being a friend, but I think we’re missing on something great. Have you thought about kissing me? How it feels like kissing you, holding you- observation- the way we hug at goodbye…
Make her feel comfortable the next morning- make a tooth brush for her.
Respect one night stands- say you had a great time and if she’s into it she can do it again, you’re not for something serious- she will be nice in public and respect you. Be honest!
Dirty girls- say “I want to take you home, rip off your clothes and do things to you that are racing through my mind, but I don’t think you can handle it. You may be dressing like a dirty girl, but I think you’re a good girl and I can’t be with a good girl right now.”
The best seducers know how to resist- not tonight, we’re not ready yet and leave.
Time of Your Life
As good as I am right now, I can get better in a minute.
Be that new person everyday. Don’t fall back at the old you.
A woman is looking in my soul and she becomes attracted. Ask a question and learn what she’s all about- no rapid questions.
I own every room I walk into. Everything I do is with enthusiasm.
Spoil yourself- write things that I want to do and do them, don’t wait until I’m 70.
Nothing will come to me- not “I want to be this”, it’s “I will become this.” I have to work at least 8 hours per day to achieve something.
I don’t want to be a guy that keeps thinking, but never does it, always has fears and excuses for every single thing!
Don’t ignore anyone- people behind the counter are the people that will make you noticeable
This is it. My past is gone. I will wear my best clothes, I will put my best version of myself out there to everybody.
How will people react to me, when I’m so different? I’m living my life, I’m the only person that can make me happy. I don’t care what people think. I walk, talk and act like I don’t care.
Women are everywhere, but at my place.
Have the time of my life every single day.
The Power of She Talk
Most men chase women. “There’s no women to talk to, let’s go somewhere else”- changing places all the time.
Record 10 stories- she talk with enthusiasm (watch voice tone, pauses…)
Talk about your passions with enthusiasm, don’t brag about material items.
Validation and Conformation
We think the rules are different if a girl is hot- we can talk to unattractive girls
It doesn’t make a difference how she looks like, but because we want to have sex with her, we started to act differently.
Be self- supportive, enjoy myself. Don’t care what happens, what people think. I don’t need Confirmation and Validation from anyone, but me.
“I never asked her for her number, because she never confirmed she liked me.”
She will never tell me, I have to just do it!
The hardest thing to accept as men is that no woman will ever validate every single thing we do.
We have funny insecurities, we want to know if they approve us and love us all the time.
Women don’t need to be told every time that they’re amazing- men do.
The minute you think you have a connection with her you want a conformation from her, you don’t kiss her right away. Women love men who just do it, without telling them first.
There is no conformation in any part of life- dating, business and investments…
We need to take risks.
There is nothing I can do if I don’t have chemistry with her.
I look exactly how I want to look.
Free yourself from conformational woman inside you.
The Power of Repetition
Be willing to get your white shirt stained. Wake up and wear the best clothes that make you feel amazing- I will never get that day back.
Everything repeats itself in 30 day cycles.
Without repetition I will not do anything great.
Every day I have to be a sponge for knowledge.
Become a library and don’t make a good conversation into a stupid one.
Repetition is the key for everything I do- kiss, sex, stories, body language… learn from it.
Do it every day and get good at it.
Unsuccessful people never fail, successful people fail all the time.
People want to talk, if they don’t they’re not in a great mood, which is not my fault.
I can’t be Warren Buffet just by reading his books, I have to invest as well.
I can’t be an alpha male without knowing how to attract girls.
Decide you want to learn more than just about yourself and become a great conversationalist.
Repetition is not boring, boring is giving up. People who are bored have given up.
If you’re broke and if there’s a job that requires you to clean floor, you better be the best cleaner there is.
Tell with enthusiasm that get’s her excited.
As cool as they appear, women are still just human beings- she does same things as men do.
“It’s so easy for me to break up- I can meet new people anytime, so if we’re not good for each other we’re not going to torture each other in this relationship anymore. I love you too much to torture you.”
I allow myself to be repetitive, and I will be successful- not perfect, but just myself.
If I’m enjoying myself and having fun while walking down the street I’m different than 95 % of guys that have monkey chatter in their head and are wondering what will happen next, and not acting.
The Dangerous Disease: Obsession
Obsession happens when you don’t perceive world as abundant.
It often happens if we didn’t even talked to her- we think there might be some kind of manual about what has to happen in order to talk to her instead of simple “Hello” or “It looks like it’s about to rain.” Even if it sounds boring, I can say whatever I want to say and I own those words!
Take advantage of every opportunity and don’t obsess about it.
Women will see you hide and hesitate and become repelled.
Instead of getting nervous and thinking “She’s amazing, I can’t talk to her”, say “She looks good, does she deserve a confident mature man like me?”
She’s not the last woman on Earth.
Don’t say “yeah, but” – I live in a small town, really like this one…
Don’t hide behind technology.
“She posted this on Facebook, she didn’t poked me back, what should I do?
Call them on their bullshit and smile.
Participate in the moment instead of wondering where I should be that would be better for me.
Instead of saying something with an obsessive voice tone, say it with a voice tone that communicates “I’m a gift.”
Obsess about being good at something without caring about the outcome- invest 12 hours/ day. If I find myself obsessing and not enjoying myself- look around and start observing.
Phone Sex Revealed
The Girlfriend Manual
Facebook: Friends To Lovers
Own The Room
The Power of the Walk In
It’s all about the way you feel about your success, about the way you walk in.
You need to frame the door.
Other guys want to fit in, they don’t want to be noticed, with no presence.
Everyone has to remember me, I will not be invisible!
Survey the room slowly, pretend there’s a string located at the top of your head – poise (completely straight back, relaxed shoulders).
Others are slouched – they reject themselves; if they don’t respect themselves and don’t work on the way they present themselves, why should I? Why should I want to be a friend with that guy? So if a guy thinks like that, how does a woman think about that guy?
He doesn’t want to be noticed, he doesn’t want to stand out, he’s not going to get anything from me.
Walk slowly and observe everyone and everything around you – find people like you, don’t try to find a guy with bad posture in the corner to talk to.
There could be people that are more successful than me, so it’s all about my posture and attitude, if I want to communicate with them.
Even before I enter the room, I think to myself “I own this room”, stop and survey the room.
Don’t do it quickly, move your head slowly to observe everything – it might take 10-15 seconds, and then figure out what you want – I want to talk to that guy, that girl is cute, there’s my friend that I want to talk to…People will notice your walk in- like I’m in charge and try to figure out who I am.
It’s social proof, also find male friends, but I need PRESENCE and CONFIDENCE.
90% of people in every room are not alpha, they are followers, so no matter what happens, I will be alpha in that room. I need to fake it until I make it.
Bill Gates wasn’t always Bill Gates, Steve Jobs wasn’t always Steve Jobs- they practiced their presence to get to that point.
Tip from a friend: When he first walks into a room he doesn’t see a girl’s body, a nice watch on that guy or a shirt, he only sees floating eyes everywhere – just eyes. You can tell a lot of things from the eyes – is he happy, present, energetic?
When you’re talking to a hot girl that is used to being hit on by guys and you don’t even notice her attractive body (not giving her any credit for her looks) that’s very powerful and unique.
Practice your story, do a research about where you’re going. Information is the key.
Be like the wolf – alpha eye contact
Google everyone, go to the person that organizes the party and say something personal to him – know something about him, so he can introduce you to other high rollers.
Know personal achievements of others, so you don’t ask generic questions that they hear all the time. Know the players before you get there.
If you don’t know anyone, just sit down and research the room.
Make a comment, do a strong hand shake with good eye contact and introduce yourself. Make sure you introduce yourself the right way – they are lucky to know you, not hopping they will accept you.
“I’m Mitja, who are you? Now you’re my friend” – just assume it.
If I decide that somebody will be my friend I just make it happen – that’s not a question, they’re gonna be lucky to be my friend.
How you do things – getting slow out of the car…
Rich powerful guys lack friends. Don’t be intimidated, know something about everything.
You get the best women, jobs, business contacts thru others – you’re only as big as your network
So why would you have a bad posture when you walk into a room and rush to the corner?
Don’t seek approval and be looking for the outcome…never!
It doesn’t matter if it’s male or female, if it’s email or in field.
Give first, put them ahead of you – don’t be the guy that just wants something from somebody, give value, help them…people who aren’t attached, who don’t need anyone are attractive.
Always be memorable – don’t be in your cube, express yourself!
Being memorable is about being unique and being yourself.
Also relate to others, sum up the person so you say something accordingly. Calibrate it, fix it when you say something stupid.
Listen to everything 6 times.
Work on your posture, eye contact, strong handshake, give everybody Clinton moment, great smile, remember something about them that’s unique.
Believe in yourself, believe in what you’re doing!
The Look of Success
Defines who you are as a man.
Men often lack style- they wear Google shirt size XXL, their house looks messy even though they have money, they have the same shoes for 10 years…
Have a house that opens up conversation – interesting stuff in place, jeans that fits, shoes, cool watch, accessories…
Everyone is going to judge you based on your appearance!
How you carry yourself, poise and also your style. Present what you want to give to the world, what kind of person you are, so you don’t have to tell them who you are – your image speaks for itself.
Bad acting – obvious face expression
Good acting – they can barely see your emotion, but they can pick it up based on your energy – it’s 90% of people can’t see!
90% of me must be said by my appearance, my image. She get’s your look, but she also knows that you picked up those jeans and that’s what makes you interesting – you present that to the world.
We are attracted to what we want to be, or to what we are.
The guy that dresses cool very often acts cool, demands attention everywhere he goes…
The guy that dresses terrible can be the richest guy in the world, but he will still often be socially awkward and unable to connect with others.
The way you dress and present yourself will open doors for you in any shape or form.
Exercise: Take a look at your closet. What doesn’t look amazing on you throw it out! Anything you haven’t wore in a year, give it away.
Women dress better, they dress for other girls to compete, they already know they look great and guys will check them out.
Email to David: Picture of yourself- what’s missing on my look
Invitation to great websites – discounts
Women put men in category, just like we do. 10-20% of guys have the balls to stand out.
They don’t sleep with guys with no style, or the nerdy guy.
Exercise: Take a look at actors that you like and dress and walk like them.
Be More Interesting
What is confidence, how do you describe it?
Confidence is believing in yourself, dropping the ego, listening to people, admitting you are wrong, walking down the street and smiling, not caring what people think, knowing that a woman is already hot for you whether she told you or not, walking away from talking to a woman and realizing that it went nowhere and wishing her a great day, being OK when a woman says no to you and asking her how her day was when you see her again without running away or pretending you didn’t see her, taking risks, spending money that you will have money in the future, being generous with the people around you and not expecting anything back, knowing that I will be successful even though you’re broke, being true to yourself and to other people, saying what you want and being free with your words, it’s not over thinking, being vulnerable, being a man…
All I want to do is learn, experience and love.
You have to be very confident to love, because if you really love you don’t expect anything back.
Love is about being real and not caring what others think.
I don’t own anybody. Love is letting go confidently of yourself and other people.
If you love yourself you will get in a lot less bad situation and people will respect you more.
Confidence is admitting what your weak points are and what you can’t do. We all can talk to women.
In life we can do anything that we want if we put or minds into it, but there are certain types of people that are better at one thing and are terrible at another. Own skills that you’re already good at, try everything. We can all become master communicators.
Confidently admit where other people can do a better job than you, reach out for them. A weak person will not admit and try to do it on their own and fail! Let others help you.
You can’t master everything, if you suck at something you need help!
Confident people know what they’re good at and then they become great at it and so they become even more interesting.
You don’t need to know everything. You need to speak what you’re passionate about, and know enough about everything else just enough, so you can carry on a conversation.
Problem with most guys is that they’re not interesting enough. They don’t learn enough about a lot of things to keep a conversation rolling, and if they don’t know something they don’t listen and don’t read – life is a cycle and that conversation will come back!
If you want to save yourself become an entrepreneur!
Watch television and read news just enough so you know what’s going on.
Each week learn something new – watch discovery!
You will be able to talk about more things – talk with passion.
Read a book a month.
Watch romance movies – learn what women are all about.
Do something new each month. You don’t need to use your phone – ask people instead.
Try different clothes, style, haircut…
“If you were as boring as you are when you meet women nobody would like you.”
Boring people you forget instantly, interesting people you don’t forget.
Create a lasting impression! Be enthusiastic and memorable and well rounded!
Talk to them, connect with them emotionally – are you having a good day? (in a store)
Don’t be Mr. Invisible – walking into a restaurant for the 20th time and the waitress says “may I help you?” like you walked in for the first time?
Get to know them, remember them, they remember you and the next time you come you can ask about that personal thing again.
Power of your Network – next time they see you, they are excited to see you, attraction is created and other people see it and your network increases.
Women are invisible and they start to wonder who I am.
“Can you hear me now?”
Learn a new thing every single day.
Everything comes when people remember you – network is everything you have.
If you lose your phone – the people that don’t forget you will call you. You can find new friends.
Build your network – good things will happen today, great things will happen tomorrow
Meet new male friends also – network increases.
“He who only talks to beautiful women is he, who never talks to beautiful women”- be open.
Don’t think to yourself that you should be talking to somebody else right now – as you talk to more and more people you learn more and you become more powerful.
So what’s the end result?
Powerful network, massive success, a tremendous amount of women and lots of money.
I’m well rounded perfect cool amazing guy – I will let the world know that.
The Power of Observation
In life if you can’t communicate you’ll never get where you want.
The most frustrating time of your life is the first 2 years when you can’t communicate.
When the kid is finally talking, parents say what he should and shouldn’t do.
And they say he can’t talk to stranger – stranger danger!
Every problem I have is because the way I was brought up. That’s how we got screwed up, they gave us social phobias. They wanted to protect us.
Understand that parents did the best they could, don’t recite the past and why you’re a certain way, you’re that way now, so let’s get out of this.
It’s about social conditioning – when we were kids and wanted to be validated and accepted from other kids.
Story: Scab nose
In life if you don’t react fast, you lose!
The greatest gift to children is to not pass this – don’t give them fears, strangers are find – teach them how to communicate.
We need to be curious – I can learn something from everybody, nobody is better than me and I’m not better than anybody.
Don’t treat people like shit – don’t snap at the waiter, don’t think “I am better than that person.”
Self-esteem prophecy – book
Every single you’re placed in a situation that you’re met to be placed in, every single person that’s near you you’re suppose to meet. All of us have to share. Everybody is there for a reason – so I want to find out what they’re all about.
Treat people with kindness, ask them how them feel.
Every single person is there so you can learn from. Don’t look at women like “I really want to have sex with her”, think of her like “We have a lot to share, so I will find out why she is in the same spot as me at the same time.”
When I’m in an elevator with 7 strangers I met to be in that elevator. Phone is now our protective device.
Every good communicator is fun, engaging and curious. Look at life that every body that you’re with has something to share with you. Every woman that crosses your path find out if she’s worthy of you, every man that crosses your path build your network with him.
You’re only as powerful as your network. Can you hear me now?
Speak with clarity. Voice tone has pattern like a wave – it goes up and goes down. Do not be a monotone talker – they are boring!
Have enthusiasm, and we’re men – we are not soft talkers!
People respond to strong powerful voice tones. Every word is said with conviction.
Life is not meant to bee edited – great talkers say what you feel, don’t over think it!
Don’t think that you will come across strange. Don’t care what others think.
Great communicators know they will create chemistry in people – they have an abundant mindset.
Don’t censor your personality for anyone, anyplace anytime – you’re telling this person that they’re stronger than you.
Nobody is stronger than me – I am a gift and I have an abundant mindset that there are plenty people that I will connect to.
The goal is meeting 30 people a day. The art of attraction is becoming attractive.
Guys always wonder and look to talk to only a beautiful woman and that’s what makes them creepy.
Instead just talk to everybody. The magic of life is creating attraction instead of chasing it and the more people you talk to the more you’re being noticed the more attractive you are.
I am a celebrity in my own life – I will walk in and own the room.
The mindset is the hardest part – believing it. I already I have master communication skills inside.
If I don’t connect with a person I dismiss them right away. I don’t care if their ass looks great, I will not play a certain role that I don’t like and go and spend money on a date, be on my best behavior for somebody that I don’t get along in the first place. Fuck them, that’s not abundant mindset, that’s limiting! If I don’t like somebody and if somebody doesn’t like me I want to get that out in the first 30 seconds!
Communication is speaking from your mind, not censoring!
I give myself permission to say whatever I want wherever I want however I want.
If you say something back it up with observation – the way she walked it, the way she shuts guys down (saying that she has great sexual energy)…
I can say anything, because I’m the best guy that ever lived. I have plenty of money in the bank, I have awesome clothes, great car and I am fucking amazing just the way I am right there right now in this day! Forget about the needs and the desires. I am enough.
I’m a perfect cool amazing guy, there is nobody better than me – I am bold, I observe and say everything like I was 4 years old and curious.
Politicians are amazing with observing – they always know when to grab the right kid for the picture, they focus on details.
They don’t think about meeting a woman, they think about relating to her world.
Women want to feel like they know you forever – they want to feel comfortable with you.
What makes you feel uncomfortable? Pick up lines!
Saying “You’re beautiful” is uphill battle. She says “Thank you” and the conversation is over.
Conversation has to be downhill – if you want to tell her she’s beautiful say “You know what? I was going to work I saw you, you have a killer energy I wanted to tell you you’re hot!” and then just walk away – she will be blown away. If it’s a line they are repelled, but saying something like that comes from your mind, not your mid-section.
Own your words! No air words!
10 spiritual laws of success – Oprah Pay a compliment every day and expect nothing back.
Don’t do it because you want something from them, do it because you mean it!
We are real with our friends and family, but when we talk to women we put on a different personality, because we read somewhere that people like a funny guy so I will be funny.
We are all funny already!
Genuine people will expose themselves and not care about the outcome.
Women are all about feelings. Communicate on their level or you will always be frustrated.
It easy to bond with guys, but how do I connect with her world?
Look at her face, what’s her emotion and how can I connect with it? The next thing is look at her actions.
Maybe she’s ordering a sandwich and you’re curious how it tastes which causes communication which causes conversation which causes a connection and women are all about connection.
They want to tell everybody about a Starbucks guy and you can be Starbucks guy. Get a nickname as soon as possible and you get it by connecting to her world.
And finally she can be wearing something -”That’s a great bracelet…” and it’s not what you say its HOW you say it! If you don’t own your words you are being week and you will give your power away. Jerry Maguire – making an entrance wherever you go, “Hello” is enough
Stand on the street corner and practice saying hello.
Say everything with authority.
No one’s talking about you, they are dealing with their own stuff.
Be a leader, get them out of their stuff. All women want to be told what to do.
They don’t feel protected from the men that are seeking validation. And it starts from the second you say hello.
Girls my age flake – I need to deal with that.
Listen – good word for attention
Exercise: Pushing yourself to the limit – become addicted to that!
What crazy thing could I do to get out of my comfort zone? How do you want to challenge yourself?
There is no such thing as knowing what to say next – it’s not pre written
Exercise: Record yourself having bad conversations and listen to it.
Rejection is a made up terminology that’s in your mind. It’s a validation of your fears that’s preventing me from meeting people. The person didn’t reject you, just meant she wasn’t interested.
She’s not perfect, maybe her dog died, her dad is sick or she just has a bad day.
All you’re looking for is one amazing connection per week.
Patience and Persistence
The most successful people have the ultimate patience and persistence. People that are looking for shortcuts and get frustrated soon disappear.
The small things get to them – one person doesn’t call them back and they’re done for the day. A few people do what they have to no matter what happens and then they do it again the next day without quitting – constantly looking online for answers, for more contacts…
Be like the wolf – mark the territory and each time you go out think that you will get something out of every party – can be a date, business contact or a lay…
As a person you have no right to change the dynamic of the conversation – you can lean back and listen without wanting to change the direction of the conversation and being insecure and people will start wondering who you are – it’s about conveying yourself and others will respect you
A weak person will try to change the conversation and turn a great one into a bad one, instead of listening and waiting for the opportunity.
Successful people allow others to talk and they talk like they talked to them for hundreds of times.
Help others so you can become friends with them – higher status people
By believing that it won’t happen you will not try and therefore it will not happen.
In life it will be a lot of failures, wondering why it doesn’t work for you – because you still don’t believe it. It’s a slow process.
By every failed situation you learn some key information or meet someone important that add up.
And that’s the ultimate patience.
Time is a valuable commodity. We don’t own anything, instead of saying that you lost all that money on your business look at where it leads you. Don’t have a poverty mentality – that’s my last 2000$ because you’re telling the universe that you don’t deserve more – instead look at it as investing in yourself
Life is a cycle – you can earn money, you can lose money, you can learn from the mistakes you make and then you make more mistakes…
Story: the hobbit – making a bunch of bad decisions because they are at the bottom of the valley and they can’t see anything – know that there will be a shift, believe in it because nothing stays the same.
A lot of people are afraid of the unknown – but we quit right before we would get there.
When we’re lost in that forest for the first time we don’t trust because we have never been there before and we get nervous, maybe we compare ourselves to other people and we do it step by step and the person that is laughing at us is the guy that gave us the advice in the first place – the guy that already did it.
Goal vs barrier
Focusing on what’s on the other side of the forest instead of focusing on the forest.
We could say to a guy “Do this every day for 6 months and your life will be completely different”, but the guy doesn’t know what’s on the other side because he hasn’t been there yet, so he doesn’t know how awesome it is. You just need to trust!
People complain about the rich people and how the government doesn’t do anything for other people, but why do we have to be the other people? Instead of complaining become one of the rich people, if you don’t like that rich are greedy – become a billionaire and donate…that’s the way you change the system. Change yourself instead of trying to change everything around you.
Most people are victims – they don’t want to change. They don’t want to take responsibility. They want that daddy figure that will take care of them, so if they screw up it’s daddy’s fault not theirs.
If you’re an entrepreneur it’s your responsibility, but at least you’re the one that controls everything, if you work for a company and it collapses it wasn’t your fault and there is nothing you can do.
Don’t be afraid of the dollar amount – you are worth what you determine it to be
They are investing in themselves. People say with pride that they wouldn’t pay that for something, but that shows that they are not worth it and they don’t want to grow.
Tripling the price and making more sales – you have to determine what you’re worth and what is your time worth!
Wisdom is believing in what you do. If you don’t believe you’re not worth that much.
Treat a costumer great and you have a costumer for life. It’s easier to sell to an existing client.
People work too hard – don’t get with a mindset that this is going to be a nightmare for 20 years
Whatever happens, tomorrow I will get up and kept moving forward – in the long run it always works out
Life is emotion in the moment – if the moment sucks it’s only a moment, when it passes I will still have my belief system
Enjoy the boring routine and improve yourself – everything is not getting incredibly better all the time. Most of your life you have to do routine and at some point you get to a higher level, then you stay at that level until you work your way up to the next one.
Never look at your pocket money as the last money you got – poverty mentality is the most dangerous mentality.
Good things happen to patient people – stick with the opportunity
We all want to love somebody, but we can’t do that if we first don’t learn to love ourselves.
I may not say everything I want (to get to the point that I want), because I don’t love myself.
Guys will meet a woman and they will try to validate themselves to her. That’s their ego talking.
They talk to her, but they don’t listen, share energy and pay attention to the details.
Guys talk to a hot woman, so they can report to their friends that they talked to a hot woman.
They try to validate themselves to their friends as well. The question is “Do I really want to get to know a beautiful woman inside and out? Do I want to feel love? Do I want to do it, to validate my ego and to say to your friends »you should have seen the hot babe I fucked last night« and then describe it to them. She wasn’t that hot for me. She didn’t had such a good time and she wasn’t emotionally connected, so my version of the story is the version that I expend to validate my ego – because I don’t love myself yet.
You want to be the big man – yes she did sleep with you, but she didn’t feel good, and she might not want to do it again, women want to enjoy themselves in bed, it’s no an ego validation to them.
Guys have to prove to their friends that they can get hot women.
I need to leave my ego outside the door, and start believing in myself– the best feeling
Most of the good teachers are older – more life experiences, I can soak more wisdom from them
Drop your ego so you are open to talk to everybody.
If I have nothing to add to the conversation or I know nothing about the topic, I just need to be quiet and listen, so that the next time that this topic comes up I will have something to say – I will do it even if my ego doesn’t want to be left out of the conversation.
A man that loves himself, believes in himself and is connected will shut up and learn, without ego.
My ego doesn’t want to admit that I don’t know something. My ego prevents me to move forward in life.
In order to become confident, self-aware and in love with yourself I have to drop the ego. That’s the number one thing to do in order to talk to women. And I also need to love myself.
Grow as a man and achieve what you want to achieve.
I don’t care what others think of me, because I know who I am. Nothing can harm me, because I don’t need to be validated by anything – I dropped my ego and validated myself.
The only way to do that is to love yourself.
Exercise: Embrace your faults and work on your faults, write your wins every day.
Don’t just go out and try to get validated and consider having a good when you talk to 5 women, and consider a bad day when you get rejected by 5 women.
Every day ignore the negative and focus on positive. What was your win, what did you share, who did you meet and connect to?
Start doing the work every single day, don’t let negative stuff bug you.
Nothing brings me down, take care of it immediately.
I don’t let anybody else effect me. If somebody doesn’t talk to me back, I walk away, I don’t talk about it and I don’t think about it, because it’s all about self love. When you love yourself you don’t care what others think and you connect with them.
Create your own existence and reality and don’t buy on the fear of what the masses are doing!
Because everybody buys in the fear – I’m too old, too young, I’m a virgin, I’m not attractive….
Exercise: Things that I want to experience, travel to, have break thru in – write them down!
Love and embrace your body, listen to it, instead of listening to your ego that is pushing you into the water.
I will let all of me out there without expectation while loving myself.
I will not let ego protect any parts of me from truly loving and connecting with people.
Love takes time – whether it’s self love, or love in another human being
Self love – no outcome, no ego
It’s just being myself, no games, just share myself with myself and other people
He who judges others, judges himself.
Exercise: Write down the ways I judge myself, the things I wish you waw and all you jealousies – who am I jealous of and why (maybe a friend that makes more money than me or is better with women and instead of congratulating them and embracing them I am jealous)
In order to connected with women at an amazing level I have to love myself.
Exercise: What places can I call home? What places am I comfortable in? And what places am I not comfortable in? Am I not comfortable there because I am comparing myself to other people and I feel intimidated?
Intimidation is a sign that I don’t love myself.
Network must be well connected- when I love yourself I attract the most amazing influential people.
Life is about being real, connected and about experiencing things.
Perfect people have ego, they judge themselves and they don’t love themselves.
I will become the best version of me.
Exercise: Do I respect myself? What don’t I respect about myself? Those are the things I need to work on in order to fall in love with myself and meet amazing women.
Memorizing pick up shit is not real confidence, it’s just a mask. Women are emotional and they connect on an emotional level.
I promised I will become the best person that I can become.
The best feeling is looking a woman in her eyes and knowing that this is what I want.
Exercise: How do you know when it’s love? What does love mean to me? What is the definition of love? How do I feel when I’m in love? What is real love?¬
It’s important, because when I learn to love myself I will want to learn how to love another person.
Finding somebody with whom you’re connected and in piece with, It’s ending a day with a kiss, holding hand as you’re walking down the street, it’s sitting next to them and realizing her laugh makes you smile, it’s watching them fall asleep and appreciating her beauty, it’s melting as you touch and explore every inch of her, it’s protecting her when things go wrong, it’s the way her eyes light up when you do a special thing for her and not expecting anything back at all.
The gift of one’s self is the best gift you can give to somebody. Respecting them and all the choices they make with no judgments at all. To truly love you listen to understand where she’s at.
There’s nothing worse than seeing your love walk down the street with someone else arm in arm and realizing that you let your ego drive her away.
If you’re not there for her she will find another one that will, don’t fear to go for it.
Women are attracted to a secure confident powerful men that love themselves.
Lost in time – feeling that you get once you start to connect with yourself, by doing these exercises, you will have a choice to date any woman that you desire, you’ll choose the one you want, you will be the chooser not the chosen.
Time just seems to disappear, you feed of each others energy, you want to know what they’re all about, you want to know everything about them, what were they like as kid, what’s their favorite food, bands, spots are and every time you learn something you want to learn more, because you get into this special world with her.
Time doesn’t matter, even if you’re tired, you get incredible feeling and you can talk for 3 hours without silence and every story you tell, she has the story with the same subject.
The feeling of being lost in time is incredible chemistry.
Time doesn’t matter, what matters are emotions and feelings.
This is the level of life you want to get to. Embrace everything, every moment, and stop caring about the time.
If you think that what you have today is not enough you will never love yourself. You will never get there. I already am enough and I have enough already.
Exercise: Journal everything I do – every insecurity and fear, every single win everyday.
Massive attack – angel
My own time is precious to me – something that I am able to give to others.